I wasn’t going to write anything and then the ridiculous
cowboy song came on and I couldn’t stop laughing. So my live review is mostly
just the lyrics to that song and some complaining. This album is a crappy pile
of crap and doesn’t even deserve to be live reviewed all the way through. The
last Noah and the Whale album was laughably bad with its absence of any kind of
subtlety and “I’m your new guidance counselor” vibe but this is a whole new
level of bad. As I look over the lyrics to this cowboy song I think they might
actually be fine if they weren’t sung in the most earnest, smug tone possible
as if no one has ever thought these kinds of thoughts before.
[Verse 1]
Some girls dream of meeting a rich
boy
Some girls dream of being a Playboy
But since I was young, I only had
one
I dreamed of being a cowboy
I used to strut up and down my
street
Wearing a Stetson and boots on my
feet
And in my mind, I'd go back in time
To a land of sand and whiskey
[Pre-Chorus]
And ooh, ooh, all the other kids
They used to tell me I was strange
But ooh, ooh, I didn't care what
they think
I knew I belonged on the plains
[Chorus]
'Cause I was born to be a cowboy
Singing in a campfire song
I was born to be a cowboy
But the cowboys are gone
[Verse 2]
Soon I gave up on the rodeo
And started listening to the radio
Got lost in the sound and I found
That I was born to rock and roll
I started playing the electric
guitar
And learned to limited repertoire
And dreamed of the days where the
bands still played
And good music could make you a
star
[Pre-Chorus]
And ooh, ooh, most people said I
should quit
Said I didn't belong on stage
But ooh, ooh, I didn't care what
they think
I knew I had songs in my veins
[Chorus]
'Cause I was born to be a rock star
Live fast and die young
I was born to be a rockstar
But the rockstars are gone
[Bridge]
How do you find your place in a
world
Where you don't belong?
All the worlds where I should have
been
They've all come and gone
[Chorus]
'Cause I was born to be someone
It was written in my faith
I was born to be a someone
But maybe I was born too late
Someone needs to tell Charlie Fink, “You are not that
interesting. No one is. Don’t ever sing about the real you ever again because
your thoughts are insipid and you write like a fourth-grader.” At least the
fast songs can be somewhat tuned out and you can pretend the lyrics aren’t the
worst you’ve ever heard but this solo album is mostly slow songs. About him, or
boring stories about people that are probably just him. I don’t have any clue
what kept him in check for the first few Noah and the Whale albums or if they
were just so catchy that I don’t notice how bad his writing is but man…it’s
bad.
Rating: One self-referential line out of 10. The one point is only
because there are a few catchy parts that made me go listen to a Noah and the
Whale album I actually liked.
Follow-up Non Live Review Notes: For some reason I listened to this album twice more. It's still laughably bad in the lyrics department but darned if it isn't a little catchy. That said, I figured out what annoys me about his delivery - he's not trying. He's smug and he knows his voice is charming and he leaves it at that instead of putting a little effort into it. The only thing he's really trying to do at all is be "pretty Lou Reed" and it's just not working. But still kind of catchy.
Download links:
Poopshare.com
Megacrap
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